Winter Is Here (6-4) 112.5
Arturo's Beans (2-8) 90.5
This was actually close in the first half of games, before Marshawn Lynch blew up with 4 TD's and 40.5 points and just totally crushed me and my chance at the upset. Not to mention that my team is total garbage and Kenny Britt, Michael Floyd, and Tre Mason were just laughably mediocre to bad. Michael Floyd is the biggest WR bust this season...he's beyond awful and he's nothing special whatsoever. Aaron Rodgers did his usual "make my shit team look like better than it is by putting up monster stats". Seriously this team is basically a team of shitfucks...and Aaron Rodgers...poor guy. One of Rodgers 6 TD's in the first half against the Bears unfortunately was a 56 yarder to Eddie Lacy...of course it was. Despite half his team on bye, Alex stays hot and puts up over 110 points again. He's also now 3rd place, which is remarkable considering where he started. Mark Ingram continues to look like a bonafide RB1 as he put up 120 more rush yards. For Alex's sake, I hope the Saints see this and don't fuck around with what's working. He should continue to shoulder most of the workload. Drew Brees had yet another solid yet unspectacular game. He had almost 300 yards passing and 3 TD's but threw 2 picks and fumbled in OT which ended up costing the Saints the game. Brees is still as solid as they come and maybe he's saving that big game for Alex when he needs it the most..in the playoffs. To make this wonderful season even better? I just erased Cindy Crisp (remember HER?) from the record books. Her 7 game losing streak was the longest in league history. That record is now mine..8 AND COUNTING. I now own the two shittiest records you can own. How awesome. My only chance at a win is next week against Mark..if I don't beat Mark..I WON'T WIN AGAIN. Alex takes on Leland next week in another sort of trap game..especially if Leland gets Josh Gordon back.
Game MVP
Marshawn Lynch (Winter Is Here)
140 Rushing Yards, 4 Rushing TD's, 1 reception, 23 receiving yards, 40.5 Points
The Bad Robofies (6-4) 97
Hoosier Daddy (3-7) 83.5
This was way closer than the score indicates, as this wasn't decided until the 3rd quarter when Brandon Marshall caught a 40 yard TD to seal the deal. Unforuntaely, Marshall suffered an ankle injury, but he doesn't look like he'll miss any time thankfully. Dad survives another Gio Bernardless game. Russell Wilson filled in nicely thanks to his rushing stats and Jimmy Graham came through huge when it mattered the most with 76 yards and two huge TD's. Ryan had great games from Roddy White and Justin Forsett but it wasn't enough and Carson Palmer's torn ACL did Ryan in for good not that he really cares much. Dad's got a tough rest of the schedule and it starts with Mayra next. He'll need his team at full strength to have a chance. Ryan takes on Kenny but who gives a flying fuck since they're both done.
Game MVP
Jimmy Graham (The Bad Robofies)
10 receptions, 76 receiving yards, 2 receiving TD's, 24 points
JTG's Warehouse (6-4) 94
Next!!!! (2-8) 77
This was another closer than it looks matchup as this wasn't decided until the Monday Night Game and there was a legit chance Leland had the upper hand with Cam Newton and LeSean Mccoy still going while Drew only had Kelvin Benjamin and a 10 pt lead. Cam SUCKED bad though with multiple turnovers and being sacked 9 times. He had two TD's but both TD passes were TO BENJAMIN. I dunno what's up with LeSean McCoy but he just hasn't been impressive whatsoever. He had a gimmie 1 yard TD to save his day but what a nightmare he's been. I seriously don't know if he's keepable. Mike Evans was the only bright spot on Leland's team with 125 and a score. For Drew..that's two unimpressive wins in a row, but wins nonetheless. Besides Benjamin, Drew got solid games from Demaryius Thomas, and Golden Tate and Julius Thomas finally snapped out his funk with a 2 TD 21 point performance. I'm still not a fan of Drew's QB situation or overall RB situation. He's definitely one of those "on the bubble" teams and it won't get any easier as he has to play Eugene next week in what is very crucial game. If Drew wins, he'll have a significant advantage in making the playoffs. Leland plays Alex next week.
Game MVP
Julius Thomas (JTG's Warehouse)
6 receptions, 63 receiving yards, 2 receiving TD's, 21 points
Bigger Balls (10-0) 120.5
Rocket Man (5-5) 93
Wow..this shit is so over. So despite on paper being the best team to matchup with Mayra and despite Mayra having no Antonio Gates, Andrew Luck, or Ahmad Bradshaw, Mayra STILL easily dispatches of Eugene by 27.5 points. It seemed at the beginning Eugene had the upper hand as the Steelers struggled (Antonio Brown and Le'Veon Bell combined for only 17 points) and Calvin Johnson was back to his old dominant self with a 113 and a score. DeMarco Murray and Julio Jones also put up solid yardage games though no TD's and Stafford was decent enough with 280 and a couple TD's. Randall Cobb would add 72 and a score as well (though he did fumble). The rest of Eugene's team though...just bad. Lamar Miller was barely involved, and Marty B and Maclin were basically invisible. For Mayra, she's got such a deep roster, she can afford let down games from two of her best players. Dez showed up with an elite performance with 158 yards and 2 TD's and that was all in the first half. Mike Wallace had 51 yards and a score (what an underrated "throw in" in that Forte trade, can't believe Mark just gave him away like that). Her two biggest moves? The players she used at TE and QB. Mychal Rivera and Mark Sanchez. Who would've though at the beginning of the year that there'd be an undefeated team who had to turn to MYCHAL RIVERA AND MARK SANCHEZ to keep the streak alive?! AND IT WORKED BEAUTIFULLY. That's the kind of season she's having...EVERY. THING. WORKS. Rivera had 64 and a score while Sanchez got over 330 yards and 2 TD's. This team is insane. Oh by the way Larry Fitzgerald? 112 yards as a flex play. I didn't even mention MATT FORTE who was SHITTY!! SHE STILL PUT UP 120.5 POINTS DESPITE FORTE, BELL, AND BROWN ALL SUCKING AND NO LUCK, BRADSHAW, GATES. You fucking kidding??! She's running the table unless Albert beats her Week 13. No doubt about it. She'll take on my Dad next week, the last team she has to beat to beat us all. Dad....tread lightly...that's all I gotta say. For Eugene, man, he's in the outside looking in right now but his team is just wayyyyy to good to NOT make the playoffs although he has dropped 3 of his last 4 (all 3 to playoff contending teams). His rest of the schedule is kind of intimidating. He needs to win 2 out of the next 3. 1 is a gimmie, he finishes the season against me, but he needs to at the very least beat Drew or Alex to secure a playoff spot. It's not going to be easy. He's got Drew next week.
Game MVP
Dez Bryant (Bigger Balls)
6 receptions, 158 receiving yards, 2 receiving TD's, 30 points
Dr. Light's Robots (6-4) 115.5
Woe Is Me (3-7) 74.5
There was a brief moment of "What if Kenny had played Romo over Ryan Tannehill" but that was pretty much squashed as Kenny's team was terrible and Matt took this easily despite a pretty bad Big Ben game. Matt looks like he found a waiver wire gem in Odell Beckham Jr. as he had yet another useful game with over 100 yards receiving. That combined with Jamaal Charles being Jamaal Charles (118 total yards and a score) and Jordy Nelson DESTROYING the Bears in only one half's work (152 and two scores in the first half) plus Emmanuel Sanders continue to put up elite WR numbers (He added two more TD's to 67 receiving yards) helped Matt put up some big points and get win #6. Matt is another one of those darkhorse teams like Alex that can put up major points any given week of the season. I like he finally made a QB trade for Big Ben but man Aaron Rodgers would've really catapulted him to the Mayra/Albert/Eugene level as far as talent goes. Matt's got a super difficult matchup against Albert next week. Kenny plays Ryan next week but let me reiterate something I said earlier NOONE GIVES A FUCK.
Game MVP
Jordy Nelson (Dr. Light's Robots)
6 receptions, 152 receiving yards, 2 receiving TD's, 30 points
Channel 4 News Team (9-1) 82.5
Shock The Monkey (2-8) 76.5
Shock The Monkey almost shocked the world and gave us our biggest upset of the season. This was wayyyyyyy closer than it had any right to be. Albert's guys played down to Mark's. Albert was actually down 8 going into last night and he needed 8.5 to win. Luckily Greg Olsen saved his ass with a 119 yard 14 point performance. Albert's got running back trouble now as Ronnie Hillman will be out a couple weeks, Fred Jackson is still recovering from his own injury, and Arian Foster has injury problems of his own. Steve Smith is also coming back down to earth and it seems like Albert's team is starting to run out of gas at the worst time possible. Only Peyton Manning (340 and 5 more Passing TD's..why experts say he's not worth ever keeping is BEYOND ME) and Anquan Boldin (95 and a score) were worth a shit. Alshon Jeffrey has been a bit of a disappointment so far, and he hasn't been looking like he's worth a 3rd round pick. Albert has little depth to work with and it's kind of a scary situation here. He'll need A.J. Green, Arian Foster, Alshon Jeffrey, and Peyton Manning to be 100% at their peak to be able to compete. For Mark, his mancrush, Steven Jackson was very useful with 81 and a score. Matt Ryan continues to look like a bust especially where he was drafted in the 3rd round. He barely had a little less than 220 yards passing and only 1 TD. Jared Cook chipped in with a long TD but just like me and Kenny, this team just isn't that good and 76.5 points wasn't going to be enough to put away Albert even on his worst day. Mark takes on me next, in which is basically the battle of last place. The loser will probably never win again. Albert takes on Matt in a game that means much to Matt than Albert.
Game MVP
Peyton Manning (Channel 4 News Team)
340 Passing Yards, 5 Passing TD's, 2 Int, 30 Points
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