After weeks of uncertainty and a million different playoff combinations we finally have the answer to who got the final two slots in the playoffs. One spot, was anticlimactic, the other, didn't officially get filled until late in the Sunday Night Game. After one of the most craziest playoff chases in league history, we now are ready to crown a new champion. That process starts next week with the 1st round of the playoffs. Who's joining me, Eugene, Leland, and Mark in playoffs? Who ended up getting the #2 seed and bye? Time to find out, in a crazy Week 13.
No Soup For You (8-5) 100.28
Winter Is Over (6-7) 99.88
Wow...if somehow Drew wins the Wane McGarity Bowl, we'll be pointing back to this critical moment on how he got in, in the first place. Drew was scoreboard watching and he already knew Dad was winning his matchup, so his only way in was a win by Leland. After Alex's horrible Thursday start, it was a no brainer that Leland had this game in the bag. NOPE. Thanks to Drew Brees, Brandon Marshall, and Delanie Walker, Alex not only was able to survive, but actually was in the driver's seat and was as sure as sure can be that he would take that final spot. All he had to do was survive Martavis Bryant. Drew's longshot playoff hopes were on Bryant's shoulder and after the 1st half of last night's game, it looked like a mere formality that it would be over for Drew. At the beginning of the 3rd quarter though, Bryant caught a 68 yard TD and basically Drew needed Leland to get 2 more points to secure a win and knock Alex out of the 6th spot. Finally in the 4th he caught one more pass and it was enough to knock Alex out by less than half a point. Just like that, the scariest 6th seed secured his playoff spot. After winning last week by 2 points, Alex loses his playoff spot by less than half a point. It was a great effort by his squad (Scott Chandler added a TD too) but the luck just wasn't on his side this time. The only worrisome thing for Drew is the possibility of a stat correction and any little correction can reverse the outcome of the game. We'll see if that happens, but for now, Drew is in. It's funny that all this talk centered around one team that wasn't even in the matchup and we haven't even talked about the winner, Leland. He actually could've scored a bye, but my team sucks ass and couldn't help him, so he ends up at the #3 seed and will take on Drew next week in Round 1. Besides Bryant, Blake Bortles was AMAZING, with 322 passing yards and 5 TD's. He finished with nearly 38 points. He's been a saving grace for Leland, because Matt Ryan has been a fantasy disaster all year. It's crazy that either Drew or Leland will be knocked out after next week in what should a close high scoring affair. For Alex, considering the state of his team all year, it was surprising to see him get that close to making it to a 2nd straight playoff. I have feeling Alex will hit the reset button and start from scratch next season. It may not feel like it, but being .4 points away from a playoff spot still qualifies as a successful season in my book. We'll see what the future holds next season for him.
Game MVP
Blake Bortles (No Soup For You)
322 Passing Yards, 5 Passing TD's, 37.78 Fantasy Points
Rocket Man (9-4) 116.22
Kumamon Express (9-4) 104.18
So I love the fact that even though I'm the first fucking seed, I'm obviously the weakest team left of the field of 6. How damn pathetic. Since starting 7-0, I ended the season 2-4, and on a 2 game losing streak. My only two wins in that span? Against non playoff teams (and I only beat Albert by fucking 4 so it wasn't even impressive). Even with Vance McDonald and Brandon Bolden in his lineup, Eugene still dispatches me with ease because my team just SUCKS beyond belief. I have a shitty QB (Eli ALWAYS ends up on my teams and ALWAYS fucks me) and a mediocre supporting cast outside of Deandre Hopkins (88 and a score mostly in the second half). Matt Forte looked good, but I don't know if I can trust that. I just don't have the talent to compete (I have the NAMES...but they are overrated shitheads). For Eugene his formula for success has been lean on Aaron Rodgers (great fantasy day on Thursday) and Julio Jones (8 for 93 yards) and the supporting cast will do the rest. It's always someone on that team. It was balanced this week but DOUG BALDWIN is who killed me with 94 yards and two TD's. Michael Crabtree added a TD, and John Brown 113 yards. This has been on the best fantasy football managing I've seen ever, considering the obstacles Eugene had to overcome. He's definitely in contention to win it all. Now he can sit and relax and see if he either plays his brother or Drew. For me, shit...it's just delaying the inevitable. How can I trust a roster that's been bad the last month and a half? I'll take on either my Dad or Mark in the 2nd round.
Game MVP
Doug Baldwin (Rocket Man)
5 Receptions, 94 Receiving Yards, 2 Receiving TD's, 23.90 Fantasy Points
BigBadBob (6-7) 115.54
Bigger Balls (5-8) 95.10
Dad takes cares of business and makes it to the playoffs for the 4th time in 5 years. All he had to do was win to get in and he did that convincingly led by his QB, Cam Newton. It's damn crazy to think Cam was drafted as Dad's BACKUP to Matthew Stafford. Dad avoided the dubious distinction of becoming the first team to start 3-0 and NOT make the playoffs. Cam was sensational with 331 passing yards, 5 Passing TD's, and 49 rush yards for nearly 42 points. He's been a HUGE reason why Dad survived that huge 6 game losing streak in the middle of the season. Brandin Cooks had a great game in the same game with 104 yard and a score. Thomas Rawls continues to be a great replacement for Marshawn Lynch with 122 total yards and a score. For Mayra, her team just couldn't click this season. Losing Le'veon Bell, first with the suspension, then with a season ending injury just killed her season. Antonio Brown went out with a BANG, with 118 yards, 2 TD's and a punt return TD. There's no doubt he'll be back on Mayra's team for another season next year. Andy Dalton was also great with 220 yards 2 Passing TD's and a rush TD. Surprisingly, Tyler Lockett was really good with 7 catches for 90 yards but the rest of Mayra's team...just awful. 11.5 combined points from half her team. Just too top heavy of a team this season. Ironically, last year's finals matchup is this years Michael Wiley Loser Bowl 1st round matchup as Mayra takes on Matt there. Dad will take on Mark in round 1.
Game MVP
Cam Newton (BigBadBob)
331 Passing Yards, 5 Passing TD's, 1 INT, 49 Rushing Yards, 41.64 Fantasy Points
Sons Of The Harpy (6-7) 145.68
Hoosier Daddy (4-9) 127.92
And because of the .4 of a point win by Leland, here is your 6th seed. It's crazy because roster wise, Drew's got the best team, yet he's a 6th seed who only got in because Leland got a crazy win against Alex. Drew gave a preview of what's to come by putting up the most points of the week. His depth is just unreal. You got Tom Brady at QB (312 Passing Yards, 3 Passing TD's, 1 Rushing TD, all without any "real" weapons) at WR Allen Robinson (what a BEAST he's been, 10 for 153 yards and 3 TD's) Demaryius Thomas (still scary despite Osweiler starting at QB, he had 61 and a score) Amari Cooper (scary high upside, not a great game, but capable of them). Drew put up nearly 146 points with Adrian Peterson sucking and C.J. Anderson getting hurt. Buck Allen was a great late season pickup as he had 170 total yards and a TD for 29 points. Julius Thomas hasn't even been that bad recently and he scored a TD as well. Ryan wasn't even bad, in fact he scored the 2nd most points in the league this week! That's just the kind of season Ryan's had. Bad luck all around (including drafting ANDREW LUCK). Every player on Ryan's team scored double digits led by of all people Brian Hoyer (nearly 300 passing yards and 3 TD's) Deangelo Williams (165 total yards) Frank Gore (94 total yards and a TD) and DeSean Jackson (80 yards and a score). Great effort to play spoiler but Drew's team was up for the challenge. Drew's 1st round opponent won't be easy, he's got Leland up next. For Ryan, it's back to the Michael Wiley Loser Bowl he goes. He'll take on Alex in Round 1.
Game MVP
Tom Brady (Sons Of The Harpy)
312 Passing Yards, 3 Passing TD's, 2 INT's, 1 Rush TD, 36.28 Fantasy Points
Woe Is Me (6-7) 93.40
Shock The Monkey (8-5) 70.92
This matchup is important for a couple reasons. Most important it knocked Mark from the 3rd seed to the 4th seed and this might have been the last relevant fantasy football game for Kenny Bybee. After 6 seasons, Kenny's decided to take a break from fantasy football as it has frustrated him to no end. I understand the frustration, year after year, he's always pined to be a favorite to win it all yet in 6 seasons he's only made the playoffs twice (though he did make it the finals two seasons ago but ultimately lost to me). This game is supposed to be fun (lol...coming from me) so if it's not anymore, maybe it is time to step back and take a breather. Kenny's "Devonte Adams Decision" last week did indeed end up costing him a playoff spot because had he stayed pat, he would've run the table and made the playoffs. Jeremy Maclin led the way with 95 yards and 2 scores. For Mark...not a great way to end the season as he team barely put up 70 points. Mark's team has been so up and down. He can put up games like this or put up 125 point games. Just a horrible performance all around and his guys will have step up next week against Dad if he wants to advance to round 2. For Kenny...it's back to the Michael Wiley Loser Bowl (which he has won twice, lol). He even gets a bye in the first round.
Game MVP
Jeremy Maclin (Woe Is Me)
9 Receptions, 95 Receiving Yards, 2 Receiving TD's, 24 Fantasy Points
Channel 4 News Team (6-7) 125.14
Light's Broken Bots (5-8) 108.10
This has to sting because Albert was next in line should Drew or Dad had lost. Of course he wouldn't have been in this situation had he not given away a game he played an inactive and lost by less than half a point. Such a brutal mistake and it's a shame because these last 3 weeks Albert's team has been putting up nice points. Even with a 0 from Stevie Johnson, Albert put up the 3rd most points in the week. Carson Palmer had over 350 passing yards and 2 TD's, A.J. Green had 128 yards and a score, Sammy Watkins had 109 yards and a score, T.J. Yeldon had 136 and a score, Doug Martin had 95 and a score and Shaun Draughn had 86 total yards and a score. Just an overall great game from Albert but because Drew led by points, it doesn't matter in the long run. He's got a bye in the first round of the Michael Wiley Bowl. For Matt....just a disaster of a season, with injuries galore which started before the season even started with Jordy Nelson tore his ACL, thus taking him out of keeper consideration for Matt. Ben Roethlisberger was great with over 360 yards passing and 4 scores for almost 38 points and Odell Beckham JR had 149 and a score. Danny Amendola and Jonathan Stewart rounded out a great effort by Matt, but it just wasn't enough to overcome Albert's surging team. The curse seems to be real and after facing Mayra in the finals last year, he'll face Mayra again.....in the first round of the Michael Wiley Loser Bowl. For Matt and the other 5 teams out of the playoffs, it was a crazy ride...but like the old saying goes..."there's always next year".
Game MVP
Carson Palmer (Channel 4 News Team)
356 Passing Yards, 2 Passing TD's, 24.24 Fantasy Points
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